Tuesday, November 30, 2004

My Love Life Is Like A Slow Jam CD

My Love Life Is Like A Slow Jam CD
By Author- LaVar "Mookie" Lard

Prologue
It has been almost two years to the day that I was left at that rainy bus stop. My heart was broken into tiny pieces and every raindrop pelted me like it weighed ten pounds. My pants were soaked up to my thighs and my shoes felt like large sponges. Every minute passed as if it were an hour. At times when it felt like twenty minutes had gone by, but one glance at my watch and I would notice that it was only one or two minutes. The rain took the place of my emotions and every raindrop symbolized the tears that I should have been shedding. I could have sworn that he knew to pick me up at 10PM. There was no question about it. He knew exactly when I finished up, so where the hell was he?
It had been an hour since school let out and I began walking to the nearest pay phone to call a cab collect. My intentions were to pay the cab once I got home. But damn, he had my keys so there was no way I could get inside my home to grab my wallet to pay the cabbie. This was what I feared. This was the feeling that was sweltering in my since he drove off with my car. What if he actually was on his way and because I left too early he doesn’t see me at the bus stop? That would make it my fault that he didn’t pick me up. Let me hurry back to the bus stop just in case he pulls up. I waited at the bus stop for an hour more then walked home twelve miles. I should have realized that his sorry ass played me stupid when he was fifteen minutes late. By then I was already drenched in my sorrows.
Years ago I had realized that every relationship has its favorite song. There is also a song that follows the relationship, which spawns from the separation of both people. I don’t necessarily expect to have that second song, but I can honestly agree that there is always a slow jam that reminds you of the many things that you and that person had. This song tends to remind you of the relationship to the ‘T’ or it can have that one verse that just spells out the entire relationship in just a few words. Oh, I can think of many songs that do just that. For example:


Alicia Keys, If I Ain’t Got You - Some people want it all, but I don't want nothing at all. If it ain't you baby. If I ain't got you baby. Some people want diamond rings. Some just want everything, but everything means nothing. If I ain't got you.

Musiq Soul Child, Half Crazy – “Lately I gotta watch what I say, cause you take things personal nowadays. We use to laugh; now you get mad. Damn, I just want my friend back.”

Destiny’s Child, Bug-A-Boo – “Its not hot that you be callin’ me stressin’ me pagin’ my beeper you're just non-stop. And it’s not hot that you be leavin’ me messages every 10 minutes and then you stop by.

Or…

R-Kelly, When A Woman’s Fed Up (Pre-molestation) – “I'm standing here looking in the mirror, saying "damn" to myself. I should have known the day would come, that she would find somebody else. And all the things I took her through. Shit, I shouldn't have lasted this long. Now I'm at this telephone booth, calling Tyrone.

I am not sure why we do this to ourselves, but we think it’s cute to choose ‘our song’ before a month has gone by. At the end of it all, we’d listen to the song over and over until it saddens us. Everyone has done this to themselves at least one time and I’m sure we all have our own slow jam CD of our pains, sadness, and our happiness. This is the story of my love life as a slow jam CD.

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